i think a contradiction

here's something i suspect.
in the united states, "expressing yourself" is a popular solution to nearly every problem. but, if the concern being expressed is "girly," then it is not legitimate. if a woman does indeed venture to explore an emotion on the "girly" side of things, it is then the other person's job to console her by saying "yes, i understand," over and over again, which would be fine, except that it is actually a form of pacification. you don't need to listen, you see; just keep reassuring her until she stops talking. then your job is done and you can forget the concern ever existed. if you prefer a more agressive method of interaction, you are even allowed to inform a woman that she is just "being a girl," and this information should be reason enough for her to "calm down" and resolve the situation on her own.
in this i see a twofold problem. 1) that an invalid emotion is a girl's emotion, and moreover 2) that not only is this kind of reinforcement telling women not to express certain emotions, it sends the signal that one shouldn't have such emotions at all, that they are a sign of weakness.
i suspect men believe this to be true. but even worse, i think many women believe this as well.