on being almost 24

i'm almost 24, and i've believed for a long time now that i would wake up one day and find myself to be an adult. but, i don't believe that anymore, nor do i care. i believe, instead, that no matter how much we might or might not develop in the process of living, that some small part of us will remain in high school. i'm becoming certain that there is some corner of our selves which holds the person who awoke within us at 16--that adolescent hungry for experience, that part child part grown-up riddled with angst, wonder, and hurt.
i mean, really. watch reality tv.
maybe as we get older, we're not as concerned with image. maybe, we get more comfortable in our own skins, so to speak. and yet (have you noticed?) as soon as we, people (we the people, hah), band together -- at work, in graduate school, at a conference -- there are still those instantaneous categories: the smart one, the popular one, the funny one, the pretty one. it's high school, people. personally, i think we just get better at hiding our classifications, either that or we get better at negotiating our roles and finding space within them. I'd like to believe the latter.

so this is my real question. if we are so much better at accepting ourselves, why are we so much worse at managing our relationships? granted, children are cruel. they might not associate with you if you don't have the right haircut, remember when? but they do talk. they're interested in you and in each other. they want to know the you inside your skin, whereas most adults, simply, no longer care. they don't notice things about each other. they don't ask uncomfortable questions, because it's assumed that as you're now an adult, you're in control of your life. to seem to think otherwise might be rude, and besides, who has the time?
how many non-profits do we have for youth in comparison to the number we have for other adults, our peers? our judgement is supposed to increase naturally we grow older, but does it really? always? how old were you when you really started screwing up, after all? i think it's interesting that we create structures to help ensure the success of our rising generations, but that once each generation rises, they find themselves alone.
in my most esteemed high school teacher opinion, i think we would be well-served to remember some of our basics...things like asking people about their day, in more than the "how are you?" sense, things like asking someone WHY she is acting the way she's acting instead of automatically assuming the worst about that person, enjoying who a person is as much as what a person is...didn't we learn this at some point in high school? didn't we learn that the whole jocks vs. geeks vs. theatre freaks was all a hoax? it was supposed to be some deep and life-changing revelation that happened in the life of every high school kid, was something cosmically designed to keep us from widening the chasms that have always separated person from person.
yet here we are. or here i am, mumbling about what i think is where we are. i'm not saying to hold hands and sing kum ba yah. and i'm not saying that, you know, we shouldn't do the whole networking thing or that we should eschew all social niceties and i'm not saying that we should organize company camp-outs every few weeks (how banal). i'm just saying that we should remember, or someone should; i should. a birthday should mean that i've learned more than i've forgotten.